Monday, June 16, 2008
Enterprise Architect: To be blunt or not to be...
I remember the days of being a consultant, where I had to criticize diplomatically. In one's career, you are bound to work with folks who just don't get it...
Blunt: "That's not what I meant, you stupid idiot. Read it again!"
Socializer: "It seems there is a misunderstanding. Let me attempt to rephrase it..."
After repeating yourself in what feels like an endless loop in a language where there is no BREAK statement, you sometimes are frustrated and loose your cool. Sometimes folks who have zero clue travels from one topic to another and brings up the same points over and over. The thing that I find works best is to not let failure deter you. Don't focus on the amount of time you are wasting with someone who isn't willing to put forth equal or greater effort to understand the message, just very diplomatically rephrase it one more time.
If you truly can't stand it anymore and are considering throwing in the towel, consider walking out and avoiding the temptation to insult. Even better, if you are talking about software design, move it along and tell folks you are going back to your desk to actually write code.
Consider, maybe they are in a role where they actually understand and have good intentions for being dense. It could be a situation where they are helping others understand that otherwise would be too embarrassed to ask questions. Maybe they actually understand and have done homework but don't know when to stop. If you cannot detect the game of mental masturbation, then you too become the idiot...
| | View blog reactionsBlunt: "That's not what I meant, you stupid idiot. Read it again!"
Socializer: "It seems there is a misunderstanding. Let me attempt to rephrase it..."
After repeating yourself in what feels like an endless loop in a language where there is no BREAK statement, you sometimes are frustrated and loose your cool. Sometimes folks who have zero clue travels from one topic to another and brings up the same points over and over. The thing that I find works best is to not let failure deter you. Don't focus on the amount of time you are wasting with someone who isn't willing to put forth equal or greater effort to understand the message, just very diplomatically rephrase it one more time.
If you truly can't stand it anymore and are considering throwing in the towel, consider walking out and avoiding the temptation to insult. Even better, if you are talking about software design, move it along and tell folks you are going back to your desk to actually write code.
Consider, maybe they are in a role where they actually understand and have good intentions for being dense. It could be a situation where they are helping others understand that otherwise would be too embarrassed to ask questions. Maybe they actually understand and have done homework but don't know when to stop. If you cannot detect the game of mental masturbation, then you too become the idiot...
