Thursday, March 06, 2008

 

Does corporate-speak rot an IT executives mind?

I have an open door policy, but please schedule an appointment with my assistant first...



I work hard to practice cliche phrases in my speeches such as having an open door policy yet I also ensure that my calendar is always blacked out as busy throughout the entire day. Of course, I am busy reciting phrases regarding agility and innovation while reading nomenclature of enterprise architecture published by Gartner. After all, it isn't intuitive to me we need strong requirements or should have business buy-in for projects we are initiating. I need the time to be spoon fed the latest PowerPoint by my insulting firm. Yes, I could have saved money by simply asking my own employees, but the PowerPoint wouldn't have been as pretty. We all know that perception is reality.

The hardest part of my jobs is in managing the likes of James McGovern and his CMMi repeatable practice of dissonance. Of course, I prefer status quo approaches as it is important that everyone feel comfortable with every decision regardless of whether the decision actually makes sense or is fully optimized. Ignoring dissonance is like ignoring innovation. Heresy.

What can only be described as a good dose of courage is when enterprise architects actually figure out how to secure the enterprise, embrace open source and adopt Agile Methods needs to be replaced with Heavyweight process.

Even though the rest of the world has figured out that Process isn't a substitute for competence, I think I am smarter and can even employ process to be a substitute. Likewise, hundreds of enterprises before me have failed miserably at outsourcing to India, yet I won't because I embrace best practices. Repeat after me, I will not fail as I will set the bar low. I will convince others that mediocrity is the way to success and can turn almost any failure into a positive...






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