Wednesday, December 28, 2005


Why America will lose the war on terror!

America is filled with idiots, let me explain why...

We all know that George Bush just got caught in another act of stupidity. He was busy wiretapping calls of American citizens without court orders. He could have used legal channels but avoided them strictly for the reason that corporate America never really gets their architecture right. The main problem is lack of focus and pinpoint accuracy. Instead he like most leaders are attempting to boil the ocean by listening to more information than they could ever hope to process.

I wonder if they have been busy listening to the many international calls I make on a weely basis? They may have heard me use the phrase "kidnap" frequently. In my second home, Trinidad; folks are kidnapped on an almost daily basis and the police are defenseless in preventing it. I was thinking that maybe one answer would be to bring Trinidadian kidnappers to America so that they can kidnap all the enterprise architects that work for the Federal Government. After all, many of them are more dangerous to America than anything Bin Laden could do to us.

Many folks in usual form concern themselves with the technology aspects of war and suggest butthead tactics (Michael Savage comes to mind) such as bombing everything and going home. The real problem is not of technology but of the human aspects of technology. Have we ever considered that the war is really about economics?

For every $1 that Bin Laden spends, America spends $100,000. Guess who's enterprise architecture is more sustainable! Likewise, since we have no form of architecture we will focus on technology such as equipment to find bombs at airports when we know that this really isn't either sustainable nor backtestable. We are successful though in torquing pretty much every customer that goes through an airport and can't even rationalize our decision in way that we believe. Maybe if we focused on the human aspects, we would realize that it makes more sense to find bombers than bombs!

Oops, I made a mistake. I forgot that a certain demographic believe that guns kill people. This is something that is constantly being countered by noble organizations such as the National Rifle Association who seemed to be filled with lots of republicans. If republicans understand that guns don't kill people and that people kill people, you would think they would get the connection of spending time finding bombers and not bombs?

As for me, I wonder if the government ever thought about diversity in hiring as a solution to their enterprise architecture problems? For folks that don't know me, I am a pretty big guy. Maybe someone in their wisdom may think that I could realistically have a chance of success by executing a covert operation at a horse jockey convention. When I failed, maybe they might then realize that I need a quick indoctrination into horse riding but would still fail to see what the real problem was like the fact that I may never be the right person (too tall and definetely too fat).

Maybe the folks tapping the phone may realize that I am onto something useful. Maybe they will convince George Bush that America needs a Chief Technology Officer and it should be me. At least, I would have recognized that projects such as FBI Virtual Case File System would become a massive abortion. I wonder if enterprise architects in the federal government have ever read the book: A Practical Guide to Enterprise Architecture. They should!

We understand that the federal government mandates enterprise architecture and that many insultants are employed creating piles of comprehensive documentation but yet seem to always fail at what is more important: working software. Maybe the reason the government fails is that they have no idea what a technology blueprint should look like. Maybe they fail because of lack of strong technical leadership.

I can promise to the citizens of America that IT systems under my leadership would be capable of stopping illegal immigration and other problems we face and do so under budget. I would have strong leadership and would appoint Stephen O'Grady as my CIO, Bruce Schneier as my Chief Security Officer and Patricia Seybold as my Chief Business Architect. Maybe I should run for government CTO? Republican party are you listening?

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